Here is one area in which I could use parenting advice - Kids Fighting.

And, I am not talking about my children and other kids. Luckily, they get along well with all of their friends!

No, I am talking about my kids and my kids. Yep - sibling rivalry at it’s worst.

In fact, my job as parent would be a lot easier if everyone just got along - all the time.

I hate hearing that whine, “MOOOOOOOOOOM, he did this or he did that.”

And how about the lovely question, “How come he gets to do so and so, and I don’t. It’s not fair!”

I have tried everything from punishment, to reward, to ignoring, to yelling. And it is probably my lack of consistency that keeps the children’s arguments alive.

I have narrowed it down to the following 10 Parenting Tips to Stop Kids Fighting (from a mom at her wit’s end):

1. Your siblings are your best friends. If you can’t treat them well, then you can’t have playdates with other friends. Sounds fair enough don’t you think?
2. You must try to work through your differences before involving me - mom. This must be done without yelling or physical contact.
3. Be flexible and open to each others suggestions. LISTEN to each other.
4. If you do call me in on the matter, then what I say goes - and you may not like my decision.
5. No teasing is allowed, under any circumstances - provoked or otherwise.
6. Remember that you are not all the same age. Behavior that is ok for a five year old may not be ok for a twelve year old, and vice versa.
7. Same as number 4, except privileges that are granted to a twelve year old may not be appropriate for a five year old.
8. Respect the decisions of your parents for rules 4 and 5. Do argue the matter and do not harbor resentment towards your siblings for those decisions.
9. If you are willing to share a toy, snack, etc. with a friend - you should also be willing to share the same with a sibling.
10. Love and respect each other - your siblings will always be there for you.

I hope this will put an end to the bickering! Let me know what works in your home.

Family Vacation Planning: Parenting Tips for Choosing the Right Hotel

I’m back from a weeklong, interesting, but not particularly relaxing vacation with the kids.

We ventured all the way out to San Francisco to visit my sister and her family. This was the first time that three of our children have made it out to the Bay Area, so of course, we tried to do a bit of sightseeing as well.

I have read all kinds of parenting tips about traveling with children. I have done it often enough that I could actually write a manual on family vacation planning. But theory and practice are always two different things. And no matter how much you try, you just can’t plan everything.

This vacation was clear across the country for us - and since we were combining visiting and sightseeing we decided to go for one week - Saturday to Saturday. I don’t usually like to take vacations that are longer than four or five days. It is just too long for our family. Eating out every day is expensive, not very nutritious and just like at home, it is hard to please everyone. One of our children has multiple food allergies and that makes it even more difficult.

Choose a Suite with Kitchenette Instead of a Standard Room
We took a step in the right direction by staying at a Marriott Residence Inn (they really rock!). In theory, the full kitchen and complimentary breakfast and weekday snack/happy hour should help with mealtime hassles.

In reality, the breakfast was fantastic and took care of one meal a day for us. And while the full kitchen was useful for reheating take out and late night snacks, we were out for most of the day. Without the proper utensils and spices/condiments and with no time to prepare meals - cooking was not a true option. Also, because we were out for most of the day, we never made it back to the hotel for the evening snack hour.

But all in all I would still go for a room with a kitchen or a kitchenette. We did save some money on breakfasts and snacks.

Choosing a Suite
Our family of six is a rather large crew. Generally we do not fit in one room when we travel. A two bedroom suite will often sleep six with two people in each bedroom and two on a sofa bed. Happily, I was able to snag a two bedroom suite on this trip. In theory, it would have been great.

The reality was that our suite was billed as a “penthouse” suite. Wow, penthouse sounded awesome - pretty luxurious, in fact. In actuality, the suite was called “penthouse” because it was a two level unit. The downstairs had one bedroom with a common sitting area (sofa bed) and kitchen. The upstairs was a loft that housed the second bed. This loft area was open to the floor below.

Thankfully, our children are old enough to respect the “power of the loft” and did not really pay much attention to the open to the floor below part. But a wiggly toddler, like my nephew, may just want to run upstairs, climb on the bed and hang over the edge while waving to mommy below. Not a good idea. Also, surprisingly, our entire unit was located on the second floor - with no handicapped access. Read, no stroller access either. Luckily, we are beyond the stroller phase as well.

One thing that the best of planning cannot eliminate are sibling squabbles. And even though each of the kids had a bed, they didn’t necessarily want to share it with a particular other sibling. So, many arguments erupted over who would sleep where. They just don’t tell you about this in Parenting 101. When we summon up the courage to tackle another family vacation (or when enough time passes that we forget about the bickering), I will make up a schedule before we leave home about who will sleep where. The younger kids each wanted to have a “sleepover” with mom and dad and to accommodate everyone, we needed the children to be a bit flexible about sleeping arrangements. We did not foresee this to be a problem. But it was.

Pool Required!
I found that a pool is still number one among parenting tips when planning a trip with kids, no matter what their ages. Our kids frolicked in the pool every night after a full day of visiting and sightseeing. Ask them about the best part of the vacation, and they will tell you it was the pool. No matter that we needn’t have traveled the length of the United States to go swimming.

Location, Location, Location
Our hotel was a bit off the beaten path so to speak. It was closer to my sister’s place but not near the sights. And driving everyday became a bit tedious (again, the sibling bickering). I don’t know if I would do it differently by splitting up the sightseeing portion of our trip and the visiting portion but it is something to consider.

And now, I have one cranky, jet lagged child demanding my attention. More nuggets of parenting advice from the trip to follow ….

photo credit: Photo Mojo
Parenting Question: My toddler is a picky eater, how do I get him to try new foods?

What toddler isn’t a picky eater? Oh, of course there is always that one child in play group that eats everything, whose mom just raves about how her child will finish whatever she puts on his plate. And once again the mommy guilt kicks in. Well then, I MUST be doing something wrong because my child won’t eat anything!

You can just send that inner monster away right now! No one ever said that parenting toddler is easy. Especially when it comes to food. Some toddlers are more adventurous than others but the bottom line is that - to a little one - trying new foods is a scary proposition. There are many factors at work here - texture, color, smell - some kids just reject these off the bat. Here are some parenting tips for toddler that may help to get junior to eat those brussels sprouts (or at least a little broccoli):

• I know it’s a pain, but continue to introduce the offending food to your child on a continuous basis. Sometimes they need to see it a few times before they are willing to try it. Let’s use broccoli as our example, steam a large batch on Monday, store the extra in the fridge and present your toddler a few small florets every evening that week with dinner.
• Make sure the rest of the family is eating the same food too. An older brother or sister (or even dad!) can easily sabotage your operation by loudly stating “I hate broccoli - it’s yucky!”.
  My best parenting advice in this situation is to enlist the family’s help before dinner. Tell them that you are trying to get toddler to try broccoli so you will be putting some on everyone’s plate. If the older ones don’t want to eat it (and it’s ok with you) then give them permission to ignore it but refrain from any negative comments.
  And another parenting tip for toddler: if you know the rest of the family really hates this food then have your toddler try it at lunch or another time when they are not around. If both you and your toddler eat broccoli together every day for breakfast or snack or whenever you can squeeze in a quiet moment and you continue to tell him how yummy it is, he just may be willing to try it.
  One last note on this tip, I use a week as an example, but it could take months or even longer. No, I’m not suggesting that you eat broccoli every day for years. What I am saying, is that you should continue to serve broccoli (or whatever other food) on a regular basis - say, once a week. You can’t expect success if your toddler only sees the food once a year.
• To state the obvious - make sure and serve other food that your toddler likes with the new food. Don’t dish out a plate of broccoli for dinner with nothing else.
• Use small portions. Toddlers tummies are rather small. Many parents, with good intentions, will dish out adult sized portions and then wonder why their child won’t eat. Really small portions work best, and the child can ask for more if they want seconds.
• Never force your toddler to eat. Always encourage. Sometimes promising that they only have to eat one bite, and if they don’t like it then they don’t have to finish it is enough incentive for the toddler to give it a try. But make sure you keep your promise!
• And a final parenting tip for toddler - make sure your child is hungry. If she just had a snack before mealtime, she will be less likely to try the new food because she wasn’t hungry anyway. Try and space out meals and snacks.

Many a parenting book has been written around the topic of picky eaters. Some, like Food Chaining: The Proven 6-Step Plan to Stop Picky Eating, Solve Feeding Problems, and Expand Your Childs Diet, take the straightforward approach to tackle this issue head on. Others like Deceptively Delicious: Simple Secrets to Get Your Kids Eating Good Food take the “if you can’t beat them, join them” approach.

Other things that a parent can do is to make meals more comfortable and fun. I have discussed the KABOOST Portable Chair Booster before. And it is still high on my list of parenting resources for mealtime.

No one ever said that parenting toddler was easy!

This is one of those “it works for me” posts. Are you looking for parenting tips for curing hiccups? (also known as hiccoughs)

Nothing is more annoying than hiccups that won’t go away.

Now, I know this sounds strange but this remedy worked for me when I was a kid. And now, it works for my kids. Here is our family’s panacea to cure hiccups.

Just take a mouthful of water. Bend at the waist so you are almost upside down - we are talking nose to knees - and while upside down, drink the water. The hiccups stop.

Remember, try this at your own risk - I am not responsible for any pulled hamstrings or otherwise that may result!

Think Blocks by Think Works, Think and Thrive - Blocks That Build a Child’s Mind

I recently had the opportunity to try out an innovative new product - Think Blocks. This is not your ordinary set of children’s building blocks but rather a toy designed to encourage conceptual thinking and build a child’s mind.

Here is a picture of a set of Think Blocks if you haven’t yet seen them:

According to the Think and Thrive website Think Blocks develop thinking skills in the followning areas:

ThinkBlocks are designed to teach four essentially important thinking skills: (1) contrasting between similarities and opposites or “distinction making”; (2) understanding part-whole structures or “systems thinking”; (3) recognizing interactions, associations, and cause and effect or “relational thinking”, and; (4) learning to see things from different points-of-view or “perspective taking”.

There are several unique features of Think Blocks that are found on other toys.

• Smaller blocks nest inside larger ones.
• Each block is magnetic.
• Blocks can be written on with dry erase marker.
• One side of the large and medium blocks is reflective (has a mirror type sticker)
• Magnetic tiles enhance the flexibility and scenario creation.

The central concept is that the smaller blocks easily nest inside the bigger ones. Thus you can explore relationships between just about anything. The large block can be a fores, the medium blocks can be plants and animals that are found in the forest, and the smallest blocks can be the food that plants and animals need. This short video shows how ecosystems can be learned with Think Blocks:

The possibilities for learning are not only for children and home. Businesses and organizations can also benefit by this visual form of learning. Presentations can be enhanced when concepts are shown, rather than just read.

Schools are another organization that will find Think Blocks to be a useful learning tool. I shared the Think Blocks with my son’s second grade teacher. She felt the blocks would bring a subject to life especially when working with small groups of children or even with special education requirements. She also mentioned that Think Blocks would be an excellent tool in a homeschooling environment.

As a parent, I like the Think Blocks and all that they have to offer. My older children used them to help conceptualize homework assignments that they were having difficulty with. The following video from the Think and Thrive website shows how Think Blocks can be used to teach basic multiplication and division concepts:

My younger children enjoyed playing with the Think Blocks and using them for grouping and creating imaginitive story lines.

If there is a downside, it would be that initially the play is very adult driven. The Think and Thrive website has a lot of video tutorials showcasing the different ways in which these children’s building blocks can be used to stimulate thought. But parents need to get involved and provide ideas and patterns. As the children become accustomed to using the blocks they will begin to take over and come up with their own ideas.

The Think and Thrive site states that the Think Blocks are appropriate for ages 4 to adult - but I found the smallest blocks to be tiny enough to pose a choking hazard to babies and children that still put items in their mouths. Just a little something to watch out for.

More information about Think Blocks, children’s building blocks for the mind, can be found at the Think and Thrive website.